A new hope

Quite a lot of water has flown down the Ganges into the Bay of Bengal since I made my last post. Happy New Year to all. 2009 was the year, when I mean ' the year ', I will remember of it (perhaps less fondly and with a worried brow) keenly. 2009 hoisted me to peaks of glory but also did not spare anything to condemn me to the dungeons of gloom. But then, I hastened towards a swift rally towards the end of the year ( I do get stronger in December, my favorite part of the year), salvaging most of my sunk pride.

2009 in my life was the year when I had to make decisions, some of which I had never dreamed of facing, some which I had always taken for granted. Suddenly questions were being asked of my ambitions, my priorities, my strengths, my identity and a thousand other things. I was confronted with questions regarding whom I could trust(this was perhaps the darkest hour and by far the most difficult phase of my life). And to be candid, I failed miserably in answering every single of those questions, I 'd completely lost the plot.

But thanks, I needed such a mirror. When I look back at 2009, I know I have put my troubles behind me (am still reeling from the shock of it, but the tremors are withstood and predictable). I came to know of certain abilities of mine that I had always taken for granted. I am now back on firm solid terrain, now able to distinguish friend from foe and have an appreciation of what I possess in life. The latter point is perhaps the most precious to me. I have grown ever more resilient and stubborn with an understanding that success never came cheap.

People keep asking me about my plans and I chuckle back (knowing what became of them when I last planned things). But hope ever pushes me on and now being on Terra firma, I am beginning to explore this newly found territory, Once the recce is over, I shall make my moves.

So what does 2010 hold for me, a lot I shall say, I have decided to sit back and look more closely at life, too turbulent it has been the past decade when I pushed back everything in the quest for glory. It's time I give life a break and give it the attention that's long due. The small chats with Papa, the cup of tea in the night, the ridiculous soaps on television, bullying my sister, the lonely walks at night and yes watching Manchester United on weekends. Long have I ignored these small titbits of happiness. So the quest for 2010 is to sit back and leisure each of these titbits. Life is priceless and I have realised it every moment of the past couple of months.

But it doesn't mean I have put my ambitions on the backburner, I am drawing deep breaths waiting for the next big plunge. It's isn't going to come soon, but I know it's going to surely some time. And when it comes, I will be ready. I will be asked all the questions again and I shall not buckle that time. I have had my share of glories and will certainly have more in the future, but this time glory shall pursue me rather that me tailing it. (I concede this may perhaps be too much but like I say, there is always hope).

Thanks to all my dear ones ( I have been grossly unjust to them, May I be forgiven) and Thanks God (Yeah I concede You do exist). May Time test me yet again and lay bare my frailties.

Adieu.